I'll have to admit "crunks" cracked me up. The formality of vambraces is fun as well but it's going to end up being something not as fun and far more doofy.
Why would the service center need to change the tire size? Couldn't the CT (equipped with TPMS) figure out based on GPS/positioning cameras how far the truck has traveled and thus calculate the diameter of the wheel? Then just math out the tires from that.