Christmas Update Rolling out to Tesla Fleet - Today

[rtfitch]

It's going live, starting today https://stats.tessie.com

Let's see when it hits the CT fleet!

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[tingmo13]

such an amazing company!
I hear lot about so & so company charges so & so price for software. Anybody have scoops?

 

[rtfitch]

such an amazing company!
I hear lot about so & so company charges so & so price for software. Anybody have scoops?

When I first reserved my beast back in 2019, it was purely on sight and shock value. Novelty factor at 100%. I knew nothing—and I mean nothing—about electric vehicles that secretly hid 845 horses ready to stampede through all four wheels at once. None of us knew about steer-by-wire wizardry, variable steering ratios, or rear-wheel articulation. And Santa certainly didn’t have a clue that Over-the-Air updates would someday feel like waking up to Christmas morning...every several weeks.

Yet here we are.

I now wake up to a full tank—well, a full charge, but tank just sounds funnier—every single day for FREE thanks to Tesla Power LTD. And the real magic? While Blitzen the Beast is asleep in the stable (fine… garage), she’s secretly training. Quietly improving. Becoming better, smarter, and occasionally louder thanks to FSD updates and the occasional surprise horn/ lock chime upgrade.

Honestly — wow.

This is the kind of stuff fairy tales brag about.

And yet… Tesla hardly advertises any of it. In my humble, jolly-old-elf opinion, they’re missing a massive opportunity. No gimmicks required. Just tell the truth about what these vehicles actually do. Because when I talk to folks, no one knows. Not about the free overnight charging, not about the software magic, not about the fact that your truck keeps getting upgraded while it’s napping. Imagine if people did know! Sales would spike like Santa's sleigh on turbo mode.

From a stable full of muscle and sports cars, I now ride almost exclusively in Blitzen with FSD doing the reins-work. The rest of the herd is quietly being… let’s say… “reassigned.” Culled sounds harsh, even for a cowboy-Santa.

And of course, I sincerly love Blitzen the Beast, Thor the Cyberdog, and Mrs. Claus —
Disclaimer: listed in no particular order…
and Mrs. Claus does not subscribe to this blog, which is probably how I’m allowed to type any of this.

 

[Jhodgesatmb]

We haven’t seen it on our 2026 MYLR. I guess I’ll go look on Teslafi since I couldn’t really see the diagram above.

 

[rtfitch]

This is NOT a fast roll out...3 days live and it is only at 6.5% released to the Tessie fleet.

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