FSD 14 release timeline update! “Next Week.”

[SCTesla]

It turns out that bidirectional charging is a feature on the new MY P. So there’s that.

Kind of.

They are getting the plug that the RWD got that can charge other Teslas, but not V2H

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[hemiarch]

Kind of.

They are getting the plug that the RWD got that can charge other Teslas, but not V2H

Yeah. But you can use that as a charging input for a power station that can run your home.

 

[Sjohnson20]

Now Monday according to Elon. I'm asssuming that it's Monday for the Youtubers and not us.

 

[Limes2]

That Monday for v14 is probably going to influencers first. Normal, general public FSD users won't see it until Halloween or later.

 

[Gigahorse]

That Monday for v14 is probably going to influencers first. Normal, general public FSD users won't see it until Halloween or later.

General public new Model Y users will see it Halloween-Thanksgiving
Cybertruck owners? we will be looking at Valentine's day before the CT influencers get it is my guess.

 

[dalton108]

General public new Model Y users will see it Halloween-Thanksgiving
Cybertruck owners? we will be looking at Valentine's day before the CT influencers get it is my guess.

That depends on how earnest your pumpkin patch is!

 

[dalton108]

That depends on how earnest your pumpkin patch is!

@hemiarch, I like to move fast and break things so, we’re already rolling out 2025.45.3.1.4.1.5.9!

Here’s what’s new in this version:

Pumpkin Patch Edition
• Sincere-field localization calibrated to maximize belief density
• Autonomous blanket-wrapping algorithm now 3× smoother
36 Hz, full-resolution sincerity-field vision inputs calibrated for pumpkin-patch illumination
• Linus-optimized patience model with extended waiting-loop endurance
• Native AI4 belief-fusion stack with parallel Great Pumpkin awareness
• 4.2× data scaling for seasonal object classes (pumpkins, scarecrows, hay bales)
• 5× sincerity-compute expansion via the Linus Cortex Cluster
• Reduced belief-to-miracle latency by 2×
• Integrated rise-from-pumpkin-patch → greet-Great-Pumpkin → return-home pipeline
• Improved reward predictions for collision-avoidance with gourds
• Dynamic routing around fallen leaves detected by fleet consensus
• Enhanced camera-cleaning model (now handles cobwebs)
• Redesigned controller for smoother, more linus-like tracking
• Great Pumpkin-aware perception, powered by Vision v14

 

[hemiarch]

@hemiarch, I like to move fast and break things so, we’re already rolling out 2025.45.3.1.4.1.5.9!

Here’s what’s new in this version:

Pumpkin Patch Edition
• 36 Hz, full-resolution AI4 video inputs
• Native AI4 perception stack with parallel neural fusion
• 4.2× data scaling for seasonal object classes (pumpkins, scarecrows, hay bales)
• 5× training-compute expansion via the Cortex cluster
• Reduced photon-to-control latency by 2×
• Integrated unpark → reverse → park pipeline
• Improved reward predictions for collision-avoidance with gourds
• Dynamic routing around fallen leaves detected by fleet consensus
• Enhanced camera-cleaning model (now handles cobwebs)
• Redesigned controller for smoother, more linus-like tracking
• Great Pumpkin-aware perception, powered by Vision v14

Outstanding. The team can already move on to pre-turkey stack and stuffing perception.
Now that we’ve written out the goals it’s as good as done.
We just need to leave three people from the team that are not working from home to do “minor fixes”

 

[AverageJoe]

He did. Pretty sure Dalton talks to himself while posting all the time.

Wait, everybody doesn't?

 

[hemiarch]

Wait, everybody doesn't?

Many hear voices it seems but only a select few answer them.

 

[AverageJoe]

Throw back from 2015

Waited 10 years for that to be relevant.

 

[Sjohnson20]

I'm really hoping the red hands are no more with this release. And the nags go down some. I would like 10 seconds if possible.

 

[hemiarch]

Throw back from 2015

Waited 10 years for that to be relevant.

All about the long-game man

 

[Bill_CT_AZ]

Still only on 13.2.9 but suddenly my CT can park in my driveway instead of trying to pull in the parking lot across the street.

 

[ABILISK]

Put your phone over the steering wheel to text. It cant see it and you’ll be able to safely text. You didn’t hear this from me. But also I’m saying this because I believe unsupervised Supervised FSD is safer that texting without it.

You, sir, are a genius. I would never verify that works or anything… so we’ll just leave it at that.

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